Gnarled and Ancient Roots

The problem with "being good" is that human beings come from such gnarled and ancient roots. We usually come closer to a hummingbird knocking his fellow hummers off the feeder than we do to Buddha.

I'm old enough to have gone through the little spiritual revolution that took place in Portland in the late 60s and early 70s. Ran a natural food store, owned exactly 1 skirt (made out of a batik Indian bedspread), one pair of Danner boots, one pair of overalls, and lived over the store. 6 of the 8 apartments over that store, in a rickety old 1920s-era wooden building, housed idealistic 20-somethings who worked there.

As Dickens said, it was the best of times, it was the worst of times. Best because we were committed and dedicated -- save the world with organic agriculture and simple living! -- worst because we knew nothing about our own shadows. So no matter how hard we tried to be good, and we did try really hard, and we did do a lot of good, every once in a while something very bad would happen. Accusations would fly, relationships would explode, gossip would flourish, feelings would be hurt.

That Utopian experiment -- plus growing up in a fundamentalist household -- taught me that "absolute goodness," or "compassion for all beings," is just not a reachable goal for most of us. There are breakthrough personalities, who truly get it and can actually do it -- Confucius, Socrates, Buddha, Jesus, Muhammad, Black Elk, Dalai Lama -- but few of us ever hit that plane. The rest of us would be better off admitting we have some unpleasant characters in our personality, and learning how to deal honestly and openly with them; better off to get to know our inner caveman, than to pretend like he doesn't exist. (first and second blogs)

It's hard to be good. In fact, some of the meanest people I know try the hardest to be good. Go to church every week end, cheat people in business every week day. Know the words to every hymn in the book, say terrible things about others. Are politically active, but have no tolerance at all for other political opinions. "Goodness" involves judgment. One thing better than another. Us and them.

"Goodness" does not occur in nature. It's another man-made construct, like justice or fairness. Beauty occurs in nature, tragedy occurs in nature, violence, love and nurturing all occur in nature. But goodness? Whether budding out or dropping its leaves, a tree is neither bad nor good. It's simply "tree." One whole thing.

Reminds me of a famous Jung quote: "I'd rather be whole than good."

If it were OK for human beings not to be so good all the time, not to always be right, not to have the last word, not to know every answer, would they become easier to live with?

If we could accept that we are merely animals -- or, with such gnarled and ancient instinctual roots, maybe even plants now and then -- could we become better human beings?